The internet is a horrible place to be

After a spirited discussion about shit things on the internet recently I realised just how much of a horrible place it is. It's full of vulgar little fuckers who think they're tough because they smoke at the age of 12 when really they'll be dead of cancer by 21, and I will still be alive to laugh at their funeral and shit in their families eyes. Anyway here's a quick rundown of the bollocks that make the internet such a bad place to be;

Glitter Text
The chances are, your profile page on MySpace will tell us all your name anyway, so why the hell do you need it displayed in 20 foot high glitter letters that move and change colour, you utter CUNTS? Fuck off, if you have glitter text on your page you're probably not worth knowing so you'll be denied a friends requests. The only friends you'll be making are the soles of my shoes as they destroy your fucking face.

YouTube members
Not all of them are arseholes but about 70% of the YouTube 'community' need to be either locked up or just slaughtered. The best comments are the ones left by small children who enjoy taking the piss out of countries they never knew existed and defending America to the death. For them, the US could be killing it's own people at mass on public television and they would still find a reason to defend it. If I ever met one of them the only thing they would need to defend would be their lungs from my fists. If ever there were a reason to allow children to play with guns, YouTube is one of them.

MySpace friends requests from bands
Just because you and your shitty little geek friends have started recording yourselves playing guitar and banging a frying pan in your garage it doesn't mean it's worth listening to. Infact, it sounds like someone gargling shit. So fuck off, I don't want to comment on your 'tracks' and I most certainly don't want to read the hundreds of chain bulletins you will be posting you talentless cocks.

DivX Stage 6
Why did they not think to make it compatible with the internet or computers in general? Usually a web based media player is designed to play media online, but Stage6 just seems to be a tool for crashing your browser/computer/temper and making you want to stab someone. It even looks like shit, like the designer jumped straight out of the later 90's and tried to make everything look all 'futuristic' by making it black, silver and blue. Get a fucking grip and FIX IT you bastards!