Saturday, June 17, 2006

EWS' blog, ranted about

http://lifefrombirth.blogspot.com is the blog site of my good friend EWS. He's better than all of you (but not me) and you should visit his site unless you want to be involved in the next plague. I noticed on his blog recently that he plugged this blog you're reading right now, so i thought i'd take him up on his offer of me getting angry over the same things as him and write a blog entry about his anger to thank him for promoting this blog about being angry and anger. That makes sense and YOU KNOW IT DOES. Here is what he wrote in his blog:

"But apart from this, I find that there are many other things I get annoyed at - annoying customers at my work, Neds that annoy me, annoying old ladies who walk across your path, or wobble when walking. All of these annoys me. Maybe I should write about them sometimes, or I might just pester Lloyd to do it, he is better then me at being angry."

So, here i am attempting to write about his anger. All I can say is that i totally agree with everything he has complained about so far;

Annoying customers at work - I get these a lot because i work in an airport and as many of you know, whenever you go into an airport your brain turns to styrofoam. People pester me to give them directions to Spain (that way, bitch) and ask me why their plane is delayed (because you're a cunt and the pilot hates you) and why there are no trollies to put their bags on (because we've melted them all down and turned them into knives which we are soon going to use to stab you in the lungs you selfish bastards). Because i wear a bright yellow jacket it means i know everything in the world, obviously. As soon as i take it off i fall over because i forget how to be a normal fucking human.

Neds that annoy me - Now, here in Taunton we don't get 'neds', we just get cunts. Today, for example, some cunts were driving around in a car firing water pistols at people because it was 'funny'. I had just bought a new mobile phone. Had those two things have met, those three burberry wearing sub-human wankers would now be in hospital having large objects removed from their eyelids. And i'd rob them, too.

Annoying old ladies who walks across your path - Again, living in Taunton, i am constantly affected by these 'things'. Old people are all fucking wankers, because they possess mostly the same traits as a drunken person. The wild weaving across the path, the inability to talk properly despite the fact they know they fucking well can, the inability to operate a mobile phone (and the striking ability to get it stolen) and the uncaused for anger. Old people always blame others for their mistakes. If they delete every single contact from their mobile they'll blame a newborn baby in Sweden. If they fall into the road and get hit by a car they'll blame a nearby hedgehog. If they drive badly they'll blame an acorn. It's about time they stopped blaming random shit and starting blaming their own general bollocksness.

So there we go, a few little bits of anger for you. Thankyou to EWS for the suggestions, it made me realise that i hate pretty much the same things as he does. Any more suggestions, drop me a line on the suggestions box at the bottom of this entry.

If you can't because you're not a member and you can't be bothered to sign up then please fuck off now.

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