Recently i’ve been buying a lot of DVDs. They’re all very good, except for the one of my Family Guy DVDs that had to be sent back because the last 3 episodes of the first disc decided to have a fit on me. But a certain online store that begins with A, ends with N and has a Z in it were very good, as they always are, with the return of the disc and i got straight back to watching it once it came back, packaged in softness itself. Except I didn’t. Because the menus seemed to want all the attention. Now, i’m not singling out Family Guy here because it’s normally quite good but lately i’ve begun to notice that almost ALL films have disclaimers and shit at the start that are far too long.
And it’s fucking me right off. First of all you get the usual ‘Do not copy this film or we will send the MI5 round to take your cat hostage’ messages, but now you also get wank such as ‘The views expressed here within are those of the members of staff interviewed and do not represent the views of the company, because we’re scared of being sued by some fat cunt who has nothing better to do than sit around eating biscuits sueing companies so he can buy more sofa to accomodate his fat fucking arse.
That’s bad enough, but then they throw on yet another sting from a random company involved with the film. Usually the company that provided the oxygen for the big Hollywood stars. Then the film starts, and by this time you’ve eaten your own hands in anger, so you can no longer pause it when you need a piss. Which just ruins the entire thing.
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